For Thursday Poets Rally: Fat Love

…or don’t.

Fat Love

I always fall for the wrong people,

This is my mistake.

People who never love me,

people who want me to break.

So I ask myself why try?

Why lie that love will save the day?

Why be ignored by another rake?

I would  rather have a steak.

For better poetry than this, please look at the other entries  http://promisingpoetsparkinglot.blogspot.com/2015/02/hyde-park-poetry-palace-thursdy-poets.html

Why I’m a loser

I never  do anything right (hence why I’m still here)

I’m useless.

Worthless.

A boil on the ass of humanity. Some people are producers, others are takers. I am the latter.

The only person who really needed me is  dead, and I can only feign being of use to others.

Who wants to live in a world where no one loves you?

I’m repulsive physically and emotionally

i’m fat.

I’m dirty

I’m average to below average intellectually.

My voice never grew up.

I’m afraid of people, and I know I’m being judged openly or discretely..

People talk down to me.

People talk about me.

Hairy.

I have a huge white-fro.

Only creepy people want me sexually.

My feelings are never returned.

Im too pussy to die.

Panic Rant #4

I feel like everything bad that could possibly go wrong is going wrong. My social worker tried to get my last month’s late fee waived unbeknownst to me, which pissed off Ol’ Marge the landlady, and renewed her interest in inspecting my apartment, suggesting my social worker be there when she swings the proverbial axe upon my neck. Yay.
My therapist is pissy because my social worker helped me get my psych nurse back through my primary doctor. She’s concerned it will conflict with her services through Medicaid billing. I’d rather have my nurse truth be told because I don’t trust my therapist much. My therapist narcs to my psychiatrist and just threatened today that if things get bad enough she’ll tell Social Services on me. I like my therapist, but from now on I’ll keep my problems to myself. I feel like giving up.