I made my BFF (read: only friend offline) angry, and when she gets super mad at me, she lashes out at me verbally. Today’s sin, and it was bad, was I didn’t get a stray cat ready to go to the vet a day earlier than I did. Now the vet doesn’t want to take her since it’s a Friday and she’s a colony cat. BFF won’t tell me if they took Callie in. She has a right to be pissed at me, but I think calling me a ‘lazy retard,’ saying my videos are ‘moronic,’ and not to expect her to spend a minute on me was a bit of an overreaction. Especially since I babysat her cockatiel who she was afraid was sick yesterday. Just saying. I think it will be OK to vent here, because she’s said before, “I don’t read your shit because I know you.”
This video has been up a couple days, and I have a few more to spew out upon the world. Oh, to be unappreciated in one’s own time!
Fun Fact: This was actually seen by someone from one of Walmart’s YouTube channels and they commented.
I happened to be in my admin trying to add a blog to it and found a few comments in moderation that shouldn’t be in moderation. I hope no one was offended.I wouldn’t intentionally leave someone in mod hell unless you’re a Russian porn bot.
But yeah, I was trying to add a blog on my blogroll. I think you should check him out, https://yeahocd.com
He writes about pure o OCD and writes in a far more eloquent style than me.
One thing I don’t like about WordPress blogroll is that it won’t show everyone on the blogroll. If for some reason you want your blog on my roll or your site isn’t showing anymore, please let me know. You don’t have to reciprocate, but if you WANT TO add me to yours, I would be flattered, even if you are a Russian porn bot.
Thestrangest thing happened to me on the way to the shrink. I think my Lyft driver is related to me through marriage.
I was running late, like super late. It was 12:30, and I was supposed to be at the shrink’s at 12:30. I took too long in the bath. I called the shrink’s office, the anxiety in my voice making my already child-like voice pitch up three times higher. I told the receptionist I was running late, was on my way, and I’d be there in 10 minutes. Please don’t hate me. Please don’t hate me, kept going through my head.
I usually take Uber when in need of a cab, because it’s cheaper. This day, however, Lyft ran a special, so I ordered a Lyft.
My Lyft driver was really nice. I could tell straight off he was gay, as there was a slight lilt in his southern accent (don’t be mad I said that, OK?). He knew exactly where we were going, too, Shrinks ‘R Us. He’s been here before, that voice in my head said.
“Which way do you want to go to get there, because that road goes straight there,” he asked.
“Whichever way you think is best, sir.”
He was an affable guy, and we did the usual cab conversation in our short drive. I asked him how long had he been driving for Lyft.
“Two years. I got laid off from my job, but I just finished my degree, so hopefully that will be able to get a job in that.”
I asked him how long he lived here and he told me he was originally from Boone, but had lived here for 11 years.
“Boone?” I said, excited. “I was born in Boone!” That started the conversation. I told him how my family hailed from a little area on the state line, an area only people from that area in the NC mountains know. He knew exactly where I was talking about. Exactly.
So, I told him every family name I knew about. It turns out his family may be related to mine by marriage. My second cousin Diane married someone with his surname. It may have been one of his father’s 15 siblings. I’m not joking.
I told him I only lived there for the first two and a half years of my life. Mom wanted out. “Everyone talked about everyone there and were very judgmental,” I said.
“That’s the truth,” he said.
I was sad when the ride ended. Here I am, Lisa, who sometimes almost forgets she’s a member of the human race, sitting in a car with someone linked to my family. It was positively surreal. I took a good look at him before I left, which is different for me, as I rarely look at people.
I haven’t seen a relative since my mother died in 2011. I didn’t tell him that my family disowned me. Maybe it was my mom, and then by default, me, they tossed in the garbage. They knew I was different, and didn’t want to be saddled with me, too.
When I got home from Shrinks ‘R Us, I looked up my kinsman on Facebook. Fortunately for me, his Facebook is open. My assumptions were right and then some. Yes, he is gay. Yes, he no doubt has been to Shrinks ‘R Us, because he’s severely depressed. I wish I could friend him, but I won’t because that would be super creepy of me.
I wonder if his family disowned him too. It is highly likely, if they’re like the remaining members of my side of the family. ‘Gay’ would be up there in unpardonables. Next to being a democrat and interracial marriage. I wish there was something I could do for him.
I actually posted this a couple of days ago, but haven’t bothered posting it here yet. My mind isn’t working right, but not bad this time exactly. Just can’t get much done. I keep getting distracted, daydreaming at length almost as bad as when I was little or unmedicated. I already have a short attention span. My brain is so useless. I keep thinking of things to write. I even have an idea for a response video to a couple of pricks on Youtube who think mental illness isn’t real. I don’t know if I’m brave (read: strong) enough to actually do it, because these are BIG GUYS with BIG FANS who are probably just as mean as they are. I got to do a lot of research on how to refute what they said, how to avoid copyright strike, etc. Maybe I can do it out of love for other people. Probably no one would notice anyway. But anyway, my next video is going to be on the weighty subject of what I got from Dollar General’s 50% off clearance. Maybe that will be up tonight.
I got my shitty laptop out of hock. This one, unlike my other laptop, has a working keyboard, so I’m hoping it will inspire me to write more. Too bad it’s 1gb of ram, slowwwww.
First of all, it’s been weighing on my mind for a few days now…but I’m sorry to whomever it was who called 5-O on me. No, I wasn’t suicidal. May I drop dead if I’m lying.
Yeah, I’m still quite peeved about it. But I shouldn’t have said you’re worthless. Everyone has worth, of course. I was just mad. I’m still angry, but not seeing crimson. Most likely, you meant well. Still, would it have killed either of us to have maybe texted me or called. You know I wouldn’t have got nasty about it. I’d have been polite. But anyway, I wish you well.
In other news, I have been filming stuff. Nothing ingenue; it’s all been done before ad nauseum, but I figure why not? Gives me something to do, and if it entertains somebody, it can’t be too bad.
I’ve started transcribing for the Smithsonian. They’ll let any idiot volunteer for that. It may not be a lifesaving thing, but maybe it’ll help someone someday. Ho hum. I’m taking a course on Futurelearn.com on forensic anthropology just because it was free and sounds interesting. I am going to write that post/ article on food stamps. I am trying to live as much as I can, and if I can’t find much adulation in the real world, maybe I can find it online. Love me, my adoring public, because I’m uber fabulous!
As you can see, I have made yet another thrilling Youtube video, and if you have 6 minutes of your life that you don’t mind not getting back, give it a watch. I’m up to 13 subscribers. Will you be number 14? It might not be as exciting as MAGA Smirk Boy, but not many things are.
I actually recorded this a week ago too, but just got it up. This one is a little better than my last trashy store haul. I edited it with Filmora Go instead of Inshot.
In other news, I’m writing a post/article about Food Stamps. Once it’s done, I’ll either throw it up here, or if I feel lucky, I might try submitting it somewhere online. I’m honestly not sure how it’s going to turn out. I’m just writing a lot of crap in a notebook for now. Wish me luck.